Agent Provocateur story so far

The Agent Provocateur story is one of lust, passion and feeding the hunger of those that are true to themselves when it comes to their sexual desires and fantasies.

We have gathered some of the Agent Provocateur’s story so far for your viewing pleasure.

Agent Provocateur Overview

Agent Provocateur’s core aesthetic principle holds that strength and confidence are sexy. Their designer lingerie has the power to enchant and arouse both those dressed in it and those who behold it. In developing a website and other communication materials for the brand, the central challenge was to convey the empowering value of its underwear through the concept of unattainability. The website’s female models tease viewers from the monitor. They are in control, but remain untouchable. Only purchase transforms an alluring fantasy into reality.

December 2014
The Agent Provocateur Holiday Gift Guide – First impressions are made only once

Our manual of etiquette with advice on charm and refinement for the festive season will certainly raise an eyebrow or 2 if not more. They say First impressions are made only once so why not dress fittingly for festive feasting?

The Main Event: Table Manners

1. The best table plans will have you seated between two men: give them both equal amounts of attention
2. Your mother was right: keep your elbows off the table – wedging them close to your waist will push your breasts out most appealingly
3. Always look after your neighbour first
4. Restraint is rewarding; wait until everyone has started eating before you do
5. Do not reach across the table, even though it affords an attractive view to fellow diners
6. Eat slowly, maintaining eye contact as much as possible
7. Before pudding men should rise and move to the left offering each lady a new partner

The Flirtation: Canapés

1. Canapés should be treated as a flirtation with a new target: sparse but scintillating, offering a taste of things to come
2. It is unseemly to loiter next to where the canapés are coming out: if you are hungry,
   simply strike a deal with the best-looking waiter to ensure he comes to you first
3. Consider appearances before choosing a canapé: a spear of asparagus dipped in hollandaise is your best possible option just ensure you don’t take a floppy one
4. It is permissible to lick your fingers
5. Don’t gorge on canapés, ensure you save some appetite for the main event

The Social Lubricant: Champagne

1. Ensure the bottle has not already been shaken by somebody else. Peel the foil from the cork in one fluid motion
2. Clasp the bottle firmly and direct the spout away from you but do not grimace – you have done this many times before
3. Slowly unscrew the metal cage covering the cork
4. With a swift stroke, gently turn the bottle, not the cork. Twisting the end can be disastrous. So always focus on the shaft
5. Aim for a sigh rather than a pop
6. Pour slowly into flute to avoid spillage, hastiness will only cause disappointment

A Good Shuck: Oysters

1. Eating oysters requires refinement and grace
2. The flesh of an oyster is delicate and requires skill in shucking – leave this part to someone with the right apparatus
3. This is your oyster and you can dress it how you please: some like to cover their oyster with something hot, some prefer their oyster a little tart
4. Pick up the shell, slowly bringing the widest end to your lips
5. Raise your chin, then tilt and slide the oyster into your mouth. Sucking hard is not recommended
6. You may chew or swallow, but never, ever spit

Wise Words from The Miss AP

Mr Stevenson, Norwich: My next-door neighbour has taken to trimming her holly tree whilst wearing little more than a semi-transparent negligee, and I wish to show my appreciation for her artful displays by offering her something in return. I thought perhaps I could bring her some of my renowned yule log. Would it be appropriate?

Miss AP: It is certainly not appropriate to present your yule log – however splendid it may be – to your next-door neighbour, particularly if said log already has a reputation. Do yourselves a favour and instead, bring her a luscious silk gown to cover up that semi naked body that she has been unwittingly flaunting to you. You never know, with such a ravishing gift she might just decide to enlist your help with her holly bush.

Mrs F, Hong Kong: What is the appropriate snack to leave out for Santa Claus?

Miss AP: That depends on what you are expecting from him. If you’re hoping for something sparkly, then I believe Santa is rather fond of a pasty – a pair is best. If you’ve been naughty and are expecting some punishment, then it would be pertinent to leave him out some cool whip. If you are hoping for a doll’s house then I suggest you look elsewhere for an agony aunt, as Agent Provocateur is probably not the place for someone of your age.

Sam Greenwood, London: I have three women that I need to buy Christmas presents for this year: my wife, the nanny and my mother. I made a vow to the moon and the stars eight years ago after a particularly harrowing incident on the high street that I would only ever visit one store to do all my Christmas shopping. This year my wife has dropped some heavy hints that she would like some Agent Provocateur for Christmas. How do I stay faithful to my vow and still keep all three women happy – in an appropriate manner?

Miss AP: Darling, haven’t you ever heard of department store concessions? Please abolish all thoughts of buying silky dressing gowns for the nanny and stockings (or worse) for your mother, and do yourself a favour by using the boutique finder on our website, finding a department store concession and buying your mother a nice teapot from the kitchen department instead.

Sabine, Geneva: Every year my aunt Greta hosts a Christmas party where everyone must bring a Secret Santa gift, and each year without fail she orchestrates it so that I end up giving my gift to some likely single lad she’s dredged up from the local choir or her insurance firm. How can I put an end to this incessant festive matchmaking?

Miss AP: A pair of golden handcuffs wrapped up deliciously in a red bow should do the trick. Once you’ve coquettishly slipped one of them round his wrist call her over to show her your appreciation for what she’s done, then deftly flick the other cuff over her very own arm. If you really want to drive the point home you could drag the two of them round the party with the rope while singing, ‘Matchmaker, Matchmaker’ – but some might find this a little outré for a Christmas party.